"Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light." (Matthew 11:28-30)
Dear Daughters,
Stress is a very real part of all of our lives. For some reason it seems that more and more people are breaking beneath the load---Christians included. My heart goes out for the many young women I talk to that are overwhelmed and burdened with their load.
You see, I know first-hand what it means to "break" under the load. I was a happy, fulfilled wife and mother. I was a pastor's wife with a church that was growing, people getting saved and many wonderful things happening in our lives when I broke under the load I was carrying. It took about 12 years of leaning on my Beloved in the darkness before my healing was complete. My post-depression verse is "Who is this that cometh up from the wilderness, leaning upon her beloved?" (Song of Solomon 8:5a)
So, what is my advice to young wives and mothers busy trying to serve the Lord and be active for the Lord when they think they're about to snap? Listen closely dears, and I pray that you'll either not become as wounded as I did or that if you are already broken the Lord will use me as an instrument for His healing in your life.
1.) Don't confuse work with worship.
Before my husband took his first pastorate he was an assistant pastor. We were very active in our local church, we had four small children (ages 5-10) and we were living on a meager salary of $125 per week. I was absolutely full of joy and delighted in the Lord and my Christian life and walk each day. This was at a time when if you had looked at our life you would have wondered how! We literally had to pray in our gas money, food money and bill money every week.
My walk with the Lord was so very, very sweet. He was my Best Friend, my Confidante, and had my utter dependence. I spent time in the word of God daily just enjoying it and letting it feed me.
When my husband took the pastorate everything was much better for us financially. We actually had plenty of money to pay bills and buy the children clothing. I can remember being brought to tears because I had enough of the "essential" clothing for myself for the first time in years.
With the pastorate came all kinds of new duties for me. It seemed everything I asked about that wasn't being done my answer was "the pastor's wife does that". I was the church secretary, Jr. Church teacher, did all the bulletin boards, coordinated all church activities, did the missions board along with many other duties I hadn't had before. Looking back it would have been better left undone that my trying to do it all but I didn't. I was afraid it would look bad.
I had been homeschooling our youngest but now I was schooling all four. My husband's duties had grown so I had more to do for him. I had lots of company on a regular basis and bunked them and fed them!
Although I didn't realize it at the time I became a Martha instead of a Mary. I had lots of busy "church activities" in my life that were visible to all but it took something precious from me to be so busy at work for the Lord--my Mary life.
Did I read my Bible and pray? Yes, but it wasn't the same. It wasn't that sitting at His feet and soaking up His presence, praying as I laundered, praying as I did dishes, memorizing His word as I did dishes, spending time just talking to Him. Instead it was hurried and became almost a rote listing of my prayer requests. More and more I was apologizing to Him for not spending as much time with Him as I should be spending and found myself just counting the chapters that I'd read to make sure I was on track with my "daily Bible reading".
At the same time I was fighting some major spiritual battles and seeing some wonderful victories. However, fighting spiritual battles draws from you and I found myself becoming more and more frustrated with things that were stressful that never had been that traumatic to me.
Then there came the day that I crashed emotionally. No one around me but my husband knew about it at first but as time went on and I became worse and worse my children found out and then my family. I withdrew more and more as my emotional state worsened. My illness did some major damage to our home, our children and my husband's pastorate. I no longer was even able to carefully "watch" over the spiritual welfare of my family. My only prayer was "Help me."
We still live with some of the aftereffects today as a family. I ask the Lord to use it for His glory however He chooses and that is one of the reasons I'm writing this. WHATEVER you do, don't trade being busy serving the Lord as your worship of the Lord. Should we be busy for the Lord? --yes, yes, yes! but that takes us to the next point.
Spending time with the Lord is something we choose--Jesus Himself said to Martha, "Martha, Martha, thou art careful and troubled about many things: But one thing is needful: and Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her." Give the Lord His time--worship Him daily.
2. Live by design and by priority.
Do you know why I write this blog? I have become (not that I always like this) an older woman. Titus calls it an aged woman. (See Titus 2:1-5) I am told to teach the younger women certain things in the word of God. That's why I take the time to do it. I see young women with different levels of frustration and my heart yearns to get them to the point where they can find joy in what they're doing. Life doesn't give us a second round and if many of our frustrations are easily resolved then I want to see them resolved for young women.
Do you know why God made you as a woman? Do you know your Biblical role? Do you know what God wants you to give your attention to and what He designed for you not to give your attention to?
Let's just look at Titus 2:4. First young women are to be sober. That's being serious about what we need to be serious about. Your spiritual well-being is serious. Second to love their husbands, then to love their children, then to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good obedient to their own husbands. Why? That the word of God be not blasphemed.
Now out of that list can you find things that require your personal attention that would consume time? Husbands? Children? A home?
Could we make a priority list here?
First, give the Lord the proper attention. Talk to Him, spend time with Him, confide in Him first, pour every trial, tear and trouble into His ear and then TRUST Him to supply your every need. Your spiritual needs, your emotional needs and your physical needs. Don't tell another soul till you've confided in Him and asked Him to help you stand perfect and complete in all His will in the situation. Then trust Him to do it in you and for you.
Second, give your husband the attention he needs. Now much of this overlaps. Husbands need their clothes laundered and their meals cooked and a nice clean home to live in but most of all your husband needs you to give him your love, loyalty and to run his home and raise his children in a way that honors his wishes for a home. We know what our husband wants (spoken and unspoken) and we should yield our will to his will. Each and every desire he has that is not a sin we should be doing our best to give him.
There were several activities my husband felt were unnecessary but I was afraid what people would think if I didn't do them and I ignored what he wanted. Although I've asked him to forgive me I still live with the fruit of not honoring his wishes.
Also, let your husband carry out his God-given role and you carry out yours. You are not loving your husband when you take on the role of bread-winner. If we're to trust the Lord with all and all then we must trust the Lord to lead our lives and meet our needs through our mate. God says that the man is to provide for his family and if he doesn't he is worse than an infidel. Don't think you're loving him by going out and getting a job in the world so you can pay the bills. You're not his mother--you're his sweetheart. You're not the other man in the house--you're the one he is to cherish and care for. Let him.
Today's young woman seems to be getting her role model from the world and the media. They are a facade. They put the woman in the man's world carrying out the man's role and make her look very successful at it. That is not true. Sit at a counseling table for any time at all and you'll find women are miserable trying to be men. God has a design and when we don't carry out things according to His design they break! Love your husband enough to let him be the man and you concentrate on being the woman--according to the Bible not the world. Make the Proverbs 31 women your number one role model. I've worked at it for 36 years and I still am falling short! It's a big order but a beautiful one!
Third, your children need your attention. You only have one time to raise them. Children need much care and that means they consume much of our time. A child "left to himself" (to send away, let loose, cast away, dismiss, give over) bringeth his mother to shame. Who have I sent my child to instead of taking personal responsibility for my child's rearing, teaching and training? The public school, tv, computer, cell phone, friends, a babysitter or daycare? They don't just need food and clothing and some "quality" time. They need us. They need Deuteronomy 6 rearing. We need to bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord as we sit, walk and stand.
Fourth, our homes. The home is the domain of the woman. Study your Bible carefully about the woman. Her ministry is through the home--not outside of the home. That's where she cares for her husband so he can go out and pastor, evangelize, or teach. That's where she raises his children carefully so they are an honor to him. That's where she cooks for preachers, puts people up as they serve the Lord, sews little clothing to give to others, and the list (from the Bible) goes on and on. The home is the wonderful little piece of heaven God has given us to serve Him in as a woman.
When a woman goes outside of the home she is no longer following God's design for her and she'll get in trouble. I remember two different women that joined our church when I was a teen and they were always at church doing something. One lady wanted to run a van route, she went on visitation all the time, she went to every meeting at every church in the area. The other one was at the Christian school or at the church volunteering to do every extra piece of secretarial work or other work that she could find.
My mother was unimpressed. She said they were doing it to avoid their work God had given them at home. She would say, "Tami, always remember your mission field is at your feet. They're neglecting their husbands, children and homes in the name of serving God and God isn't honored with that." Before I was married both women were divorced and out of church.
Don't take my word for it. Do a Bible study and see where God has women ministering. If women are out of the home see what God says about them. If they are out of the home and in a spiritual position see what condition the nation was in spiritually at the time and see if God liked it. God made the man for the position of going out into the world and holding positions of leadership and authority and we're his helpmeet. We are to see to it that he can do his job efficiently and with our encouragement and help!
Count phone calls, internet time, and other "gates" out of your home as time out of the home. Remember God's warning about younger widows who have married and cast off their first faith? "And withal they learn to be idle, wandering about from house to house; and not only idle, but tattlers also and busybodies, speaking things which they ought not." (I tim. 5:13) The word learn means "to learn by use and practice, to be in the habit of" and the word idle means lazy, shunning from the labour which one ought to perform". If you're doing all the Bible tells you to do as a woman you won't have time for wandering from house to house (even by phone or internet) speaking things which you shouldn't be speaking.
What a beautiful place the Lord has given us to work. What a wonderful and varied life's work He has given us. Domestic skills (and the word "keepers" in Titus 2 means "working at home, caring for the home, the watch or keeper of the house, keeping at home and taking care of household affairs, a domestic") are some of the most wonderful skills to learn. Entire websites and blogs are dedicated to our lives--crafting, cooking, sewing, interior design, childcare, cleaning, and the list goes on and on and on. God put the love for the domestic things in a woman--feed that instinctive love He has given you. I love my chosen career. I love being able to use the home the Lord has given us to minister to those He has given me to care for and attend to.
So dear ones, if you are careful (to be anxious, to be troubled with cares, to seek to promote one's interest, to be annoyed in spirit), or troubled (disturbed, to be troubled in mind, disquieted) then I pray that you will come to the Lord and yield yourself completely to Him. If you've never yielded yourself to Him for salvation then that is the first and most important step of your life. He alone can wash away every sin, put His precious blood on you, enter your life and heart and save you from the destruction of being a sinner against God by saving your soul.
If you are saved then yield your all to Him and let Him have full control of your life. Agree to give up your plans, dreams, ideas, hopes, and possessions and put them in His care. Start a walk of sweet fellowship and friendship and choose to sit at His feet daily.
Remember there is no grace for anything you're doing that He hasn't chosen. You're on your own and let me assure you that the arm of flesh will fail you. Whatever God orders/prescribes for you He enables you to do and gives you grace and strength when your flesh fails you. "My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion for ever." Psalms 73:26)
I pray that this has given you new hope and new strength and perhaps for someone very stressed and worn out emotionally it will get you back to a pathway of joy and healing.
With love,
Mom
Monday, October 11, 2010
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Fall Cookin"...
The air has a different feel to it. When I step on the porch in the morning the air is cooler and it is stirring differently in the trees. The light through the trees that comes into my bedroom is a different shade of green--it's signalling the change of a season. I'm so ready for the brisk days and nights and for opening the windows again and letting the cool air come through our home.
At breakfast about two weeks ago I asked the kids what they thought of when they thought of fall meals. They mentioned Cheesy Potato Soup, Chili, Corn Chowder (the potato soup or the chowder are served in bread bowls sometimes), Beef Stew,Taco Soup, Pot pie, Goulash with piping hot corn bread on the side, deer tenderloin fried and then baked with warm brown gravy around it, Rotel, and other hearty comfort foods.
I start wanting to make my favorite desserts made with apples, pumpkins and oatmeal. I think of desserts with caramel flavor and lots of cinnamon. Mmmmm....out come the cookbooks and I pull out my Maple Nut Twist breakfast bread, Pumpkin Roll, Little Debbie Oatmeal Cakes (homebaked), German Apple Cake, Apple Crisp, Apple Dumplings, Monster Cookies, Pumpkin Praline Cheesecake, Pecan Pie, Spice Cake with Cooked Caramel Frosting and Pumpkin Doughnut Drops.
Last year I made a delicious pumpkin cake out of Jennibeth's cookbook "Dining with Pioneers Volume II".
We had celebrated Thanksgiving together and had just about emptied out the pantry and we were looking for something to make with what was left. She said she had a can of pumpkin left so I dug through the cookbooks and found this recipe. It mentioned cream cheese frosting but we didn't have cream cheese so I made the cooked caramel frosting and we put it on it. (I did a double batch since it was a three layer cake.)
It was SOOOO good!
So in celebration of the beginning of fall I'm going to put the recipe on here for Pumpkin Cake with Cooked Caramel Frosting. Enjoy! I'm planning on making it in the next couple weeks and will try to add a picture here then.
2 cups sugar
1 cup oil
4 eggs
2 cups flour
2 tsp. soda
1 tsp. salt
4 tsp. cinnamon
Combine sugar and oil. Add eggs separately, beating well to combine. Add flour, soda, salt and cinnnamon to sugar mixture. Blend thoroughly. Bake at 325 degrees for 25 minutes in pans that have been greased and floured. Makes three (3) 9" round layers.
Cooked Caramel Frosting (or Easy Penuche Frosting)
1/2 cup butter or margarine
1 cup brown sugar (packed)
1/4 cup milk
2 cups powdered sugar
Melt butter or margarine. Stir in brown sugar. Heat to boiling, stirring constantly. Boil and stir over low heat for two minutes. Stir in milk, heat to boiling. Remove from heat and cool to lukewarm.
Gradually, stir in powdered sugar. Place pan of frosting in bowl of ice and water; beat until it's of spreading consistency. If frosting becomes too stiff, heat slightly, stirring constantly.
*Remember-I double this for this cake.
What's your favorite fall recipe? Is there something you just have to have before the season is over? We love food traditions at our house and these are some that we cannot imagine not having at the table this time of the year. I hope you're enjoying the beautiful weather, the changes and the plans of the season! Isn't God good to give us wonderful changes and such a beautiful creation? Enjoy, enjoy!
At breakfast about two weeks ago I asked the kids what they thought of when they thought of fall meals. They mentioned Cheesy Potato Soup, Chili, Corn Chowder (the potato soup or the chowder are served in bread bowls sometimes), Beef Stew,Taco Soup, Pot pie, Goulash with piping hot corn bread on the side, deer tenderloin fried and then baked with warm brown gravy around it, Rotel, and other hearty comfort foods.
I start wanting to make my favorite desserts made with apples, pumpkins and oatmeal. I think of desserts with caramel flavor and lots of cinnamon. Mmmmm....out come the cookbooks and I pull out my Maple Nut Twist breakfast bread, Pumpkin Roll, Little Debbie Oatmeal Cakes (homebaked), German Apple Cake, Apple Crisp, Apple Dumplings, Monster Cookies, Pumpkin Praline Cheesecake, Pecan Pie, Spice Cake with Cooked Caramel Frosting and Pumpkin Doughnut Drops.
Last year I made a delicious pumpkin cake out of Jennibeth's cookbook "Dining with Pioneers Volume II".
We had celebrated Thanksgiving together and had just about emptied out the pantry and we were looking for something to make with what was left. She said she had a can of pumpkin left so I dug through the cookbooks and found this recipe. It mentioned cream cheese frosting but we didn't have cream cheese so I made the cooked caramel frosting and we put it on it. (I did a double batch since it was a three layer cake.)
It was SOOOO good!
So in celebration of the beginning of fall I'm going to put the recipe on here for Pumpkin Cake with Cooked Caramel Frosting. Enjoy! I'm planning on making it in the next couple weeks and will try to add a picture here then.
2 cups sugar
1 cup oil
4 eggs
2 cups flour
2 tsp. soda
1 tsp. salt
4 tsp. cinnamon
Combine sugar and oil. Add eggs separately, beating well to combine. Add flour, soda, salt and cinnnamon to sugar mixture. Blend thoroughly. Bake at 325 degrees for 25 minutes in pans that have been greased and floured. Makes three (3) 9" round layers.
Cooked Caramel Frosting (or Easy Penuche Frosting)
1/2 cup butter or margarine
1 cup brown sugar (packed)
1/4 cup milk
2 cups powdered sugar
Melt butter or margarine. Stir in brown sugar. Heat to boiling, stirring constantly. Boil and stir over low heat for two minutes. Stir in milk, heat to boiling. Remove from heat and cool to lukewarm.
Gradually, stir in powdered sugar. Place pan of frosting in bowl of ice and water; beat until it's of spreading consistency. If frosting becomes too stiff, heat slightly, stirring constantly.
*Remember-I double this for this cake.
What's your favorite fall recipe? Is there something you just have to have before the season is over? We love food traditions at our house and these are some that we cannot imagine not having at the table this time of the year. I hope you're enjoying the beautiful weather, the changes and the plans of the season! Isn't God good to give us wonderful changes and such a beautiful creation? Enjoy, enjoy!
Thursday, August 26, 2010
Just Had To Try This...
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| The original shirt! |
Last week when I went to get some clothes out of my closet and one of my husband's shirts was hanging there in front of my clothes. I couldn't figure out what he wanted me to do with it so I left it there to ask him about it when he got home from work.
When I asked him he said that he was going to throw it away because the collar was worn out. He just forgot to do it! Instantly I had visions of a little dress tutorial I'd seen on http://www.dana-made-it.com/2008/07/tutorial-shirt-dress.html. She had made several little dresses that were out of men's shirts and even had a tutorial on how to do it! It was my opportunity to make something for Halle! (Since the other girls had got twirly skirts and culottes this summer.)
So I copied off what I thought was essential (since my memory isn't what it used to be!) and began my journey on Monday. Now Monday was also the first day of school for us so not a lot got done on the dress. Basically, I got the collar and sleeves cut off!
I am not a decisive person so it took me a while to get my courage up to cut it out. I "measured twice and cut once", thought it looked really good, so I made myself a pattern to use in the future with my little special instructions written all over it.
I had looked all over the internet for different people's attempts at "refashioning" or "repurposing" a man's shirt into a little girl's dress and had seen one with these beautiful little Euro ruffles down the front. That took care of the rest of Tuesday's spare minutes. I was playing with ruffles for the front of the dress. After all, if we're going to go on a "design and create" tangent let's go all the way with it and have some fun!
Then I decided we needed another fabric in with the shirt fabric--enter new ruffles to go between the ones out of the shirt fabric. And then I decided it should probably go on the edge of the sleeves and the tail of the hem. Somewhere years ago I read a second color of design should always be added by odd numbers. (put it in one,three or five places but not in two or four.)
On to the next stage...
Since Niki had sent me Halle's measurements I was now ready to add elastic to the neckline and to the sleeves. That was Wednesday. My husband made the comment that he didn't know how a quick little thing like making a man's shirt into a dress could be taking all week. Of course it can--when half the time you're designing and playing and then you sew for 10 minutes between helping with school work! And we had to have our exercise time, game night (Pictionary), and just plain being silly together!
Today I was determined to bring my fun to an end--after all, someone has got to stop and do some cleaning around here this week! So here's the grand finale. I'm very pleased with it and look forward to having a picture of Halle modeling her Grandpa Gary's shirt turned into the cutest little shirt dress! So here it is!
A big thank you to Dana for putting such a wonderful and easily understood tutorial on her blog. It was a slightly bigger project than I excpected (due to my wanting to stick little ideas of my own here and there) but I loved the cost-$0.00! Now that makes me want to go to the nearest thrift store and find my next project!
If anyone else does something like this I'd sure like to hear about it and find out where you learned about it and what you did!
Love,
Mom
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Oxford's Holy Club
The past three weeks or so I've been going through boxes that we were keeping under our house in a storm room. We found out about six weeks ago that everything in that room was molding! Not good, since it held the Christmas tree, my fall decorations, all my wreaths and the list goes on.
The box that upset me the most was my keepsake box. It's been safely kept in the shed for 13 1/2 years but now it had some mold in it so I've been going through it a little each day. (It's a big box and mostly letters and papers.)
I have laughed, cried, and shook my head at much of what I've read. I've asked myself why I kept every little card given to me. I have laughed at Niki's early, early days of poetry, Alicia's nighttime notes she left her daddy and I and the boys birthday party decorations and special artwork and notes. I've been surprised to see how much Nathan wrote to people and talked about his schoolwork! I've enjoyed notes and letters talking about Nevin's love of costumes and playing Civil War, cowboy and frontiersman.
I've found letters from friends and church members from long ago that have made me happy and sad. I've read many letters from my mother and from friends and realized we really don't change much over time. Those that complained about everything early in their lives are still complaining when I talk to them, those that kept a good attitude and trust in the Lord are mostly still doing it. I can see my children's strengths and weaknesses. I've seen all my strengths and weaknesses and laughed ruefully that I'm still fighting many of my early besetting sins--however, I am walking in victory in most of them! Time (and learning to "put on" the Lord Jesus Christ are wonderful lessons to learn) is a helpful thing in our lives.
Today I want to quote a paper that I had copied that had been a great help to me when I was a young mother and had just surrendered all to the Lord. It is convicting but good! I quote:
The members of the Holy Club in Oxford in John Wesley's day examined themselves every Sunday on the love of God and the simplicity of their faith; on Monday, they examined themselves on their love toward their fellowmen and submitted themselves to twenty-seven quiestions; and so on throughout the week. Here are some of the questions:
1. Am I consciously or unconsciously creating the impression that I am a better woman than I really am. In other words, am I a hypocrite?
2. Am I honest in all my acts or words or do I exaggerate?
3. Do I confidentially pass on to another what was told me in confidence?
4. Can I be trusted?
5. Am I a slave to dress, friends, work or habits?
6. Am I self-conscious, self-pitying, or self-justifying?
7. Did the Bible live in me today?
8. Do I give it time to speak to me every day?
9. Am I enjoying prayer?
10. When did I last speak to someone else with the object of trying to win that person for Christ?
11. Am I making contacts with other people and using them for the Master's glory?
12. Do I pray about the money I spend?
13. Do I get to bed in time and get up in time?
14. Do I disobey God in anything?
15. Do I insist upon doing something about which my conscience is uneasy?
16. Am I defeated in any part of my life, jealous, impure, critical, irritable, touchy or distrustful?
17. How do I spend my spare time?
18. Am I proud?
19. Do I thank God that I am not as other people, especially as the Pharisee who despised the publican?
20. Is there anybody whom I fear, dislike, disown, criticize, hold a resentment toward or disregard? If so, what am I doing about this?
21. Do I grumble or complain constantly?
22. Is Christ real to me?
Whew...I don't know about you, but a few of those stung! I am adding them to my current event book of things that must be deal with. Thank You Lord for reminding me of those things that I need to change.
Applying these truths to our lives will definitely help bring revival in our lives.
Let's each pick the one we need to work on the most and begin to take steps immediately to remove or add to our life what the Holy Spirit desires to enable us to obey in!
Love,
Mom
The box that upset me the most was my keepsake box. It's been safely kept in the shed for 13 1/2 years but now it had some mold in it so I've been going through it a little each day. (It's a big box and mostly letters and papers.)
I have laughed, cried, and shook my head at much of what I've read. I've asked myself why I kept every little card given to me. I have laughed at Niki's early, early days of poetry, Alicia's nighttime notes she left her daddy and I and the boys birthday party decorations and special artwork and notes. I've been surprised to see how much Nathan wrote to people and talked about his schoolwork! I've enjoyed notes and letters talking about Nevin's love of costumes and playing Civil War, cowboy and frontiersman.
I've found letters from friends and church members from long ago that have made me happy and sad. I've read many letters from my mother and from friends and realized we really don't change much over time. Those that complained about everything early in their lives are still complaining when I talk to them, those that kept a good attitude and trust in the Lord are mostly still doing it. I can see my children's strengths and weaknesses. I've seen all my strengths and weaknesses and laughed ruefully that I'm still fighting many of my early besetting sins--however, I am walking in victory in most of them! Time (and learning to "put on" the Lord Jesus Christ are wonderful lessons to learn) is a helpful thing in our lives.
Today I want to quote a paper that I had copied that had been a great help to me when I was a young mother and had just surrendered all to the Lord. It is convicting but good! I quote:
The members of the Holy Club in Oxford in John Wesley's day examined themselves every Sunday on the love of God and the simplicity of their faith; on Monday, they examined themselves on their love toward their fellowmen and submitted themselves to twenty-seven quiestions; and so on throughout the week. Here are some of the questions:
1. Am I consciously or unconsciously creating the impression that I am a better woman than I really am. In other words, am I a hypocrite?
2. Am I honest in all my acts or words or do I exaggerate?
3. Do I confidentially pass on to another what was told me in confidence?
4. Can I be trusted?
5. Am I a slave to dress, friends, work or habits?
6. Am I self-conscious, self-pitying, or self-justifying?
7. Did the Bible live in me today?
8. Do I give it time to speak to me every day?
9. Am I enjoying prayer?
10. When did I last speak to someone else with the object of trying to win that person for Christ?
11. Am I making contacts with other people and using them for the Master's glory?
12. Do I pray about the money I spend?
13. Do I get to bed in time and get up in time?
14. Do I disobey God in anything?
15. Do I insist upon doing something about which my conscience is uneasy?
16. Am I defeated in any part of my life, jealous, impure, critical, irritable, touchy or distrustful?
17. How do I spend my spare time?
18. Am I proud?
19. Do I thank God that I am not as other people, especially as the Pharisee who despised the publican?
20. Is there anybody whom I fear, dislike, disown, criticize, hold a resentment toward or disregard? If so, what am I doing about this?
21. Do I grumble or complain constantly?
22. Is Christ real to me?
Whew...I don't know about you, but a few of those stung! I am adding them to my current event book of things that must be deal with. Thank You Lord for reminding me of those things that I need to change.
Applying these truths to our lives will definitely help bring revival in our lives.
Let's each pick the one we need to work on the most and begin to take steps immediately to remove or add to our life what the Holy Spirit desires to enable us to obey in!
Love,
Mom
Friday, August 20, 2010
Back to "Home" School!
I'm 55 years old and have the pleasure of having grandchildren (17 to be exact with #18 coming right about Christmas time) and also still having "at home" children. Asher graduated last year which was sweet, wonderful and sad all at once!
However, I've still got Cierra (who is a 9th grader this year) and John (a 5th grader) so my days of homeschooling are still here for me. It has been a wonderful adventure that I wouldn't trade for the best private school available in town.
When we began homeschooling it was pretty much unheard of. Our local librarian introduced me to Raymond Moore's books telling me that she thought it fit my philosophy of mothering. I brought the children into the library at least twice a week on our daily walks and my children LOVED library books! (They loved books in general, but our personal library was rather small at the time!)
I soaked in what I read and took it to heart. Niki was already forcing me to teach with "What letter is that?" "What does it say?" She was reading well at four years of age, but in all truth I had to explain (when people exclaimed what a wonderful teacher I was to my four year old) that she pretty much taught herself by asking questions and applying my answers. It certainly wasn't any kind of planned schooling!
That's part of what turned the lightbulb on in my head. I taught my children almost every skill they had (good and bad:). I potty trained them, I taught them manners, hygiene and right from wrong. I had taught them how to talk and I had read to them so much that they had a huge library in their heads already! So, why did I think I couldn't teach them school?
(I've had more than one mother in my life tell me they couldn't possibly teach their children at home and then go to college and get an education and guess what they are now? Yes, you guessed it! They're a teacher! Teaching 20 or so of someone else's children.)
True to my personality I got on the bandwagon in a big way. I began researching, contacting others who had schooled their own children and finding out everything I could about this new thing called "homeschooling". My husband, who was a Christian school teacher and principal, wasn't quite so enthusiastic.
We had made the decision when the Lord gave us children that if we had to sell the furniture out from under us we would not do two things in our marriage. I would not go to work outside of the home and our children would get a Christian education--not one from "Caesar".
Although Gary thought it was a good idea he also felt it would appear like we had a double standard in our life if he worked in a Christian school and then homeschooled his own children. He also felt it would appear we were disloyal to our pastor's decision to have a Christian school at our church. (Because he was on staff.) I didn't agree but I knew the Bible taught me to obey my husband so I simply began to pray about it.
The year that Nathan was to go to Christian school I felt heartbroken. It would just be little Nevin and I at home and my husband and children were going to be at the Christian school.
Many people had suggested I come to work at the Christian school and I began playing with the idea that someone had planted in my mind that the church was simply an "extension" of the home.
The year Nathan was to go to first grade there wasn't a teacher available as our teacher's mother had developed cancer and she had made the decision to be with her mother. I cannot tell you how excited I was that anyone with a K-5 child needed to make other arrangements! Nathan had his first year of school at home! Nevin sat on the floor and listened and learned as he played with his matchbox cars.
The next year Nathan went to school with his sisters and his dad and I taught Nevin K-5 at home. So much fun!
But the new school year was coming and then I was going to be in an empty house--no hubby and no children. All of them at the church. I began dwelling again on just going to work at the Christian school and thinking of it as an extension to our home. I approached my husband and got an emphatic no! That decision had been made and it was not negotiable! Back to praying.
In my times when I am the very closest to the Lord my praying is simply talking to Him and pouring out my heart just like I was talking to a friend I could trust with my deepest secrets. So many times in our conversations He shows me where the problem I'm telling him about has me as part of the solution. (Or should I say that I am part of why there's a problem!) I had a lot of things to learn.
That year my husband accepted a pastorate in Tennessee and when we moved there we were free to homeschool all four of our children. Wow! The first year of homeschooling all four was a year of lessons! Although I loved every minute of it I quickly realized that if I had tried starting with all four I might have ended up being a homeschool dropout! I had no idea how much time was involved in four compared to one! The Lord gently worked me from one to two and then to four! Praise the Lord for a husband who operated by principles and obeyed them. Praise the Lord I truly believed in obeying my husband and trusting the Lord to work it out if it was truly His will.
When we first began homeschooling all four of our children I asked the Lord to give me a homeschool "core curriculum" passage from the Bible. He gave me II Peter 1:5-8. I realized that first we needed to diligently teach our children that the Bible was the final authority for our lives and they needed to place their faith in Christ and His Word. Then we needed to diligently work to develop godly character in their lives (virtue), and after those two things we needed to add the knowledge (facts) , temperance (self-control), patience, godliness, brotherly kindness and charity. It's the best curriculum plan I've seen out there and I lay it beside every curriculum I find and many of them fail on the first item! (faith)
Now we're to the year 2010 and I'm a homeschool veteran. I'll be 62 years old when John graduates from high school. I wouldn't have any other life. I always catch myself in August getting that little thrill back of the new school year about to start.
Do I have days I wish I could pack them in the van, drop them off at the nearest school and tell them I'll be back in two days or two weeks or maybe even two months? You better believe it! My motivation is to please and obey my Father and nothing else and that's what gets me through the days (and sometimes weeks!) that are overwhelming with their duties.
On the whole however the Lord has made our homeschool journey a wonderful trip. I still go through old papers and old photo albums and get tears in my eyes. I still love looking at the new year with its new books (or computer program) and feeling a little thrill of what the adventure of our new year will be.
I pray that you have seriously looked at your home, your family, your children and seen the priority that God gives to our giving our children an education that is Christ-centered and that in the end will give Him glory. We're spending our life on what we treasure and I can't think of anything better to invest in than sitting, walking, standing and teaching our children! (Deuteronomy 6)
Love,
Mom
P.S.- Dr. Raymond Moore recommended that you make a philosophy of education plan and put it into words to read and re-read on a regular basis to keep yourself focused and on course. Here's ours. We haven't changed our minds (or hearts) about it since it was written in 1982 or "83.
"As Bible-believing Christians we believe and accept for our life standards the perfect Word of God. God's Word is the final authority for our lives.
Based on this, we believe God's Word teaches us that we are responsible for the provision and care of our children. We believe that we are accountable to God for the spiritual, mental, emotional and physical care of our children. (I Tim. 5:8)
We also believe that God commands us to teach and to train our children. God's Word qualifies us to be their teachers and we believe what He calls upon us to do, He also equips us to do. (Deut. 4:9, Deut. 6:1,2,6,7, Deut. 11:18,19, Exra 8:21, Ps. 78:1-7, Prov. 4:3-5, Prov. 22:6, Eph. 6:1-4, I Thess. 2:11,12)
We believe the Bible offers a plan of education in II Peter 1:5-8. It is our personal goal to lead each child into a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, (salvation by faith), and to build onto that godly character, (virtue), and then add to that pertinent facts, (knowledge). We believe knowledge without character or Christ will produce a child that is a detriment to society.
Our homeschool is set up with the father as the final word and the decision maker and with Christ as his authority. (Eph. 6:22-33) The mother carries out his wishes and has the role of teacher. (Prov. 6:20, Prov. 31:1) The children have the responsibility to listen to and obey instruction. (Eph. 6:1-3, Prov. 6:20, Prov. 4:1-4)
We carry out our teaching according to Christ's example in Acts 1:1--do and teach. What we require and instruct we also teach by example.
It is our goal to produce children who know Christ as their personal Saviour, who live their live by character and principle and who are well-trained in basic academic skills.
Psalms 127:1-5 and Psalms 144:12 express our heart's desire for our home and children. we desire children to go out as arrows into a dark world and to make a difference.
Mr. and Mrs. Gary Neal
However, I've still got Cierra (who is a 9th grader this year) and John (a 5th grader) so my days of homeschooling are still here for me. It has been a wonderful adventure that I wouldn't trade for the best private school available in town.
When we began homeschooling it was pretty much unheard of. Our local librarian introduced me to Raymond Moore's books telling me that she thought it fit my philosophy of mothering. I brought the children into the library at least twice a week on our daily walks and my children LOVED library books! (They loved books in general, but our personal library was rather small at the time!)
I soaked in what I read and took it to heart. Niki was already forcing me to teach with "What letter is that?" "What does it say?" She was reading well at four years of age, but in all truth I had to explain (when people exclaimed what a wonderful teacher I was to my four year old) that she pretty much taught herself by asking questions and applying my answers. It certainly wasn't any kind of planned schooling!
That's part of what turned the lightbulb on in my head. I taught my children almost every skill they had (good and bad:). I potty trained them, I taught them manners, hygiene and right from wrong. I had taught them how to talk and I had read to them so much that they had a huge library in their heads already! So, why did I think I couldn't teach them school?
(I've had more than one mother in my life tell me they couldn't possibly teach their children at home and then go to college and get an education and guess what they are now? Yes, you guessed it! They're a teacher! Teaching 20 or so of someone else's children.)
True to my personality I got on the bandwagon in a big way. I began researching, contacting others who had schooled their own children and finding out everything I could about this new thing called "homeschooling". My husband, who was a Christian school teacher and principal, wasn't quite so enthusiastic.
We had made the decision when the Lord gave us children that if we had to sell the furniture out from under us we would not do two things in our marriage. I would not go to work outside of the home and our children would get a Christian education--not one from "Caesar".
Although Gary thought it was a good idea he also felt it would appear like we had a double standard in our life if he worked in a Christian school and then homeschooled his own children. He also felt it would appear we were disloyal to our pastor's decision to have a Christian school at our church. (Because he was on staff.) I didn't agree but I knew the Bible taught me to obey my husband so I simply began to pray about it.
The year that Nathan was to go to Christian school I felt heartbroken. It would just be little Nevin and I at home and my husband and children were going to be at the Christian school.
Many people had suggested I come to work at the Christian school and I began playing with the idea that someone had planted in my mind that the church was simply an "extension" of the home.
The year Nathan was to go to first grade there wasn't a teacher available as our teacher's mother had developed cancer and she had made the decision to be with her mother. I cannot tell you how excited I was that anyone with a K-5 child needed to make other arrangements! Nathan had his first year of school at home! Nevin sat on the floor and listened and learned as he played with his matchbox cars.
The next year Nathan went to school with his sisters and his dad and I taught Nevin K-5 at home. So much fun!
But the new school year was coming and then I was going to be in an empty house--no hubby and no children. All of them at the church. I began dwelling again on just going to work at the Christian school and thinking of it as an extension to our home. I approached my husband and got an emphatic no! That decision had been made and it was not negotiable! Back to praying.
In my times when I am the very closest to the Lord my praying is simply talking to Him and pouring out my heart just like I was talking to a friend I could trust with my deepest secrets. So many times in our conversations He shows me where the problem I'm telling him about has me as part of the solution. (Or should I say that I am part of why there's a problem!) I had a lot of things to learn.
That year my husband accepted a pastorate in Tennessee and when we moved there we were free to homeschool all four of our children. Wow! The first year of homeschooling all four was a year of lessons! Although I loved every minute of it I quickly realized that if I had tried starting with all four I might have ended up being a homeschool dropout! I had no idea how much time was involved in four compared to one! The Lord gently worked me from one to two and then to four! Praise the Lord for a husband who operated by principles and obeyed them. Praise the Lord I truly believed in obeying my husband and trusting the Lord to work it out if it was truly His will.
When we first began homeschooling all four of our children I asked the Lord to give me a homeschool "core curriculum" passage from the Bible. He gave me II Peter 1:5-8. I realized that first we needed to diligently teach our children that the Bible was the final authority for our lives and they needed to place their faith in Christ and His Word. Then we needed to diligently work to develop godly character in their lives (virtue), and after those two things we needed to add the knowledge (facts) , temperance (self-control), patience, godliness, brotherly kindness and charity. It's the best curriculum plan I've seen out there and I lay it beside every curriculum I find and many of them fail on the first item! (faith)
Now we're to the year 2010 and I'm a homeschool veteran. I'll be 62 years old when John graduates from high school. I wouldn't have any other life. I always catch myself in August getting that little thrill back of the new school year about to start.
Do I have days I wish I could pack them in the van, drop them off at the nearest school and tell them I'll be back in two days or two weeks or maybe even two months? You better believe it! My motivation is to please and obey my Father and nothing else and that's what gets me through the days (and sometimes weeks!) that are overwhelming with their duties.
On the whole however the Lord has made our homeschool journey a wonderful trip. I still go through old papers and old photo albums and get tears in my eyes. I still love looking at the new year with its new books (or computer program) and feeling a little thrill of what the adventure of our new year will be.
I pray that you have seriously looked at your home, your family, your children and seen the priority that God gives to our giving our children an education that is Christ-centered and that in the end will give Him glory. We're spending our life on what we treasure and I can't think of anything better to invest in than sitting, walking, standing and teaching our children! (Deuteronomy 6)
Love,
Mom
P.S.- Dr. Raymond Moore recommended that you make a philosophy of education plan and put it into words to read and re-read on a regular basis to keep yourself focused and on course. Here's ours. We haven't changed our minds (or hearts) about it since it was written in 1982 or "83.
"As Bible-believing Christians we believe and accept for our life standards the perfect Word of God. God's Word is the final authority for our lives.
Based on this, we believe God's Word teaches us that we are responsible for the provision and care of our children. We believe that we are accountable to God for the spiritual, mental, emotional and physical care of our children. (I Tim. 5:8)
We also believe that God commands us to teach and to train our children. God's Word qualifies us to be their teachers and we believe what He calls upon us to do, He also equips us to do. (Deut. 4:9, Deut. 6:1,2,6,7, Deut. 11:18,19, Exra 8:21, Ps. 78:1-7, Prov. 4:3-5, Prov. 22:6, Eph. 6:1-4, I Thess. 2:11,12)
We believe the Bible offers a plan of education in II Peter 1:5-8. It is our personal goal to lead each child into a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, (salvation by faith), and to build onto that godly character, (virtue), and then add to that pertinent facts, (knowledge). We believe knowledge without character or Christ will produce a child that is a detriment to society.
Our homeschool is set up with the father as the final word and the decision maker and with Christ as his authority. (Eph. 6:22-33) The mother carries out his wishes and has the role of teacher. (Prov. 6:20, Prov. 31:1) The children have the responsibility to listen to and obey instruction. (Eph. 6:1-3, Prov. 6:20, Prov. 4:1-4)
We carry out our teaching according to Christ's example in Acts 1:1--do and teach. What we require and instruct we also teach by example.
It is our goal to produce children who know Christ as their personal Saviour, who live their live by character and principle and who are well-trained in basic academic skills.
Psalms 127:1-5 and Psalms 144:12 express our heart's desire for our home and children. we desire children to go out as arrows into a dark world and to make a difference.
Mr. and Mrs. Gary Neal
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
In Memory of My Father-In-Law...
My first real memory of Charles was at my husband's 16th birthday party. I only remember that he was very nice to me--I was too nervous about meeting Gary's parents to remember much else!
Little did I know that in the next 36 years I'd spend more time with this man than with my own father! (Because of my father being a missionary and living in another state.) He became a very real and wonderful part of my life.
I could divide our lives with Charles into "before salvation" and "after salvation". They were like night and day. Although he was a wonderful father-in-law and a fine man before his salvation, after he was saved he became so precious to me as my second dad.
I remember Gary inviting him over for me to cook him a "real southern meal" during the early years of our marriage. (Remember, I'm from the north originally!) I was a nervous wreck. He seemed very happy with my pinto beans, fried potatoes, and corn bread. He did let me know the beans could have cooked a little longer! :)
He was delighted with each grandchild's birth and always came to see me after they were born. He loved his grandchildren and was very, very proud of them.
When Charles was 50 years old he gave us the greatest gift a man can give his family--he trusted Christ as his Savior in July of that year. What a change!
After his salvation, he and AllaDean spent Sundays with us till he moved to Tennessee. He retired two weeks after his salvation and moved to his home state. What memories our children (and Gary and I too) have of visiting him at his cabin he was building! Niki has posted a picture (on Facebook) of the kids riding on the lawnmower with their grandpa on one of those visits.
We made a trip down there to make sure he found a good church so he would get grounded and grow. We watched with joy as he threw away the old life and grew by leaps and bounds in his new-found faith. Our children would spend at least a week or two each summer with Grandpa Charles and Grandma AllaDean. Each time we came to get them they had learned something new. He and AllaDean invested their lives into our children.
Then Gary took the pastorate at the church where Charles was attending! For 8 1/2 years their lives and our lives were intertwined almost daily. What a blessing they were in our church. What a blessing they were as grandparents to our growing brood! What sweet memories we have of our days together at that pastorate.
During that time God blessed our home with Asher Obadiah. Charles hadn't been able to spend the time with our older children like he had wanted and he saw Asher as God's little extra blessing from heaven.
From the day of Asher's birth he and Asher bonded. (Grandma AllaDean was just as close a bond!) We've never been quite sure if Asher was ours or if he was half ours and half theirs! :)
Asher was his Grandpa Charles' shadow. If Grandpa was cleaning the fellowship hall he had a toddler behind him "helping". Many a time Asher's grandpa rocked him to sleep while we finished our duties at the church.
Then came the sad day our pastorate ended and we had to say good-bye to the days of daily interaction. Grandpa Charles didn't let that end his wonderful relationship with our children.
He and AllaDean moved to Jamestown and built another cabin and our children have sweet memories of campovers at Grandpa's during their college days. When the Lord gave us Cierra and John he welcomed them with open arms and was the same wonderful Grandpa he had been with the other five children. More children meant more joy to Charles--he loved having his home full of them!
He still kept an active involvement in our lives and continued living a consistent Christian life. I've only met one other person that I thought witnessed to each and every person the Lord gave them an opportunity. That other Christian is my own dad.
Grandpa was at each and every important event in our lives and the lives of our children. He was a faithful visitor when anyone was sick. When I was so sick two years ago one of the few memories I have of the first night was Charles standing at my bedside and patting my arm.
What a role model he has been for our children (and for me). What faithfulness and love he has always had for family. What a burden he has had for those who don't know the Lord or aren't where they should be with the Lord.
One of my favorite memories of Charles was pulling into their drive and seeing him sitting on the porch waiting for us. When we left he always followed us out and didn't leave the porch till we were out of sight. I'll never pull away from their house without seeing him in my mind's eye waving as we left. I wish I had a picture of it, but I've got a mental snapshop that will never leave.
Oh, dear "second" dad I'm going to miss you so. Thank you so much for loving me, being patient with me, teaching me, and being a part of my life. You'll be missed each day that we have left on this earth till we meet you in heaven.
I love his note he left in his Bible, "I'll be waiting in glory for those of you who love our Lord Jesus Christ." Till then Charles, I love you!
Your "first" daughter,
Tami
Monday, August 9, 2010
Where Has This Been All My Life?
Yesterday I clicked on a link for a website called Just a Pinch Recipe Club at http://www.justapinch.com/. While looking through their recipes I found a recipe for Muffin Tin Eggs. It had the most wonderful idea for making eggs given by a lady named Jane Louise. She said she got the recipe from an Amish woman.
You simply take your muffin tins and spray them with cooking spray and then put a little butter (or margarine) in the bottom of each tin. You break an egg in them and pepper and then bake them in a 400 degree oven that has been preheated for 10 minutes.
This seemed absolutely wonderful! Her picture showed these perfectly rounded eggs on an English muffin with meat and cheese. She said you can bake them a little longer to use the eggs for egg salad and that she spices things up by adding goodies to them before baking them. (like bacon bits, salsa, or shredded cheese.
Well, I decided today was the day to give this idea a try. I could just see how convenient these would be on a day with a houseful of company to make them into egg sandwiches, etc. I mean--wow- you could do 24 eggs in 10 minutes!
So, my visiting grandchildren and my own children got to be my guinea pigs. I stuck them in the oven and while they were baking I warmed some deli ham lunchmeat and toasted the thins.
When the thins came out of the toaster I popped an egg on them, put three slices of deli ham on them and a piece of Velveeta cheese. They were an absolute success. Sorry to say I didn't take pictures of them but they looked as good as they were!
The kids liked their McMommy's sandwiches along with a pretty sherbert dish full of fruit for breakfast. I liked how simple it all was! I found myself asking "Where has this idea been all my life?" and caught myself dreaming about how it would work in cutting the time down and making a larger round of egg (for the thins since they're bigger than an English muffin) if I used my large muffin tins....hmmmm....that's for another breakfast!
Anyway, thought I'd pass this wonderful breakfast idea along. Enjoy!
Love,
Mom
p.s. She doesn't say anything about giving the eggs a stir to mix the white and the yolk but I thought the kids would like it better that way so I did. Here's the link to this wonderful website. You also can explore Jane Louise's recipes--she's my kind of cook!
www.justapinch.com/recipe/muffin-tin-eggs-by-jane-louise-lovinspoonful
You simply take your muffin tins and spray them with cooking spray and then put a little butter (or margarine) in the bottom of each tin. You break an egg in them and pepper and then bake them in a 400 degree oven that has been preheated for 10 minutes.
This seemed absolutely wonderful! Her picture showed these perfectly rounded eggs on an English muffin with meat and cheese. She said you can bake them a little longer to use the eggs for egg salad and that she spices things up by adding goodies to them before baking them. (like bacon bits, salsa, or shredded cheese.
Well, I decided today was the day to give this idea a try. I could just see how convenient these would be on a day with a houseful of company to make them into egg sandwiches, etc. I mean--wow- you could do 24 eggs in 10 minutes!
So, my visiting grandchildren and my own children got to be my guinea pigs. I stuck them in the oven and while they were baking I warmed some deli ham lunchmeat and toasted the thins.
When the thins came out of the toaster I popped an egg on them, put three slices of deli ham on them and a piece of Velveeta cheese. They were an absolute success. Sorry to say I didn't take pictures of them but they looked as good as they were!
The kids liked their McMommy's sandwiches along with a pretty sherbert dish full of fruit for breakfast. I liked how simple it all was! I found myself asking "Where has this idea been all my life?" and caught myself dreaming about how it would work in cutting the time down and making a larger round of egg (for the thins since they're bigger than an English muffin) if I used my large muffin tins....hmmmm....that's for another breakfast!
Anyway, thought I'd pass this wonderful breakfast idea along. Enjoy!
Love,
Mom
p.s. She doesn't say anything about giving the eggs a stir to mix the white and the yolk but I thought the kids would like it better that way so I did. Here's the link to this wonderful website. You also can explore Jane Louise's recipes--she's my kind of cook!
www.justapinch.com/recipe/muffin-tin-eggs-by-jane-louise-lovinspoonful
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